Author Archives: Amanda Manney

About Amanda Manney

Hi friend, thanks for stopping by! I'm Amanda. I am a pastor's wife and a homeschooling mom who has a passion to encourage women to faithfully step every day into what God has for them.

When You Feel Like God Has Forgotten You

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Feeling Alone

Do you ever feel utterly alone? Do you sometimes feel as though God has forgotten you? We know God says He will never leave us, nor forsake us. So why do we feel at times that He is so far away?

Are you facing pressures and frankly feel like God has forgotten you? You are not alone. There are times when I feel like my prayers aren’t being answered. I feel like He isn’t listening to me. Sometimes it’s a feeling that comes and goes; other times, it’s a feeling that won’t go away.

What do you do when God hasn’t answered your prayers, and you feel like He is silent? What happens when you don’t know the next step to take and feel utterly alone?

God Left Hezekiah

A few weeks ago, I read a really interesting verse in II Chronicles during my morning time. I was reading about the life of Hezekiah. Hezekiah was the thirteenth king of Judah. He sought God with all his heart in every aspect of his life, and God prospered him because of it.

And in every work that he began in the service of the house of God, and in the law, and in the commandments, to seek his God, he did it with all his heart, and prospered. II Chronicles 31:21

Great things happened during Hezekiah’s reign. God defended Hezekiah and his people and blessed them during his reign. But there’s a very interesting verse that appears in II Chronicles 32.

…God left him, to try him, that he might know all that was in his heart. II Chronicles 32:31

If you read in II Chronicles, you read all about Hezekiah’s success and blessing from God; and then all of a sudden you stumble upon this verse. What? God left him… God left Hezekiah?

Hezekiah sought God with all his heart. He was a Godly king who did everything right. Yet God left him.

When God is Silent

I realize that this is the Old Testament, and the Holy Spirit hadn’t come to earth to stay yet. So God’s presence came and went in the Old Testament. If we are saved, we now have the Holy Spirit living inside of us. We can’t truly be without God. But consider this for a moment. If God left a Godly king for a time to see what was in his heart, could it be possible that God allows us times when He is silent in our lives? Does He allow us to go through a time where it is “as if” He left us so that He can see what’s in our heart?

I believe it is entirely possible. How do I know this? Because I have been through it a few times in my life. I have encountered a few specific times when God is absolutely silent. I still have my morning time every morning when I pray, read my Bible and journal. There’s no great sin in my life that I’m aware of. I am actively seeking God with all my heart. And yet…He seems so far away. I pray and don’t get any answers. I feel like I am walking in absolute darkness.

Could it be that God uses these times to test what is in our hearts? Will we continue to follow Him even when we can’t see our way clearly? Do we trust Him explicitly even though it doesn’t make sense? Is our faith strong enough to withstand the silence? Will I stay faithful, when all I want to do is run?

What Do You Do When God Seems So Far Away?

I don’t know if you have ever had a time like this in your life? Maybe you are there right now. I am. I am in a place where I need to hear God’s voice and know His peace. Yet right now, He feels so far away. What do you do during this time? How do you get through?

I don’t have all the answers. I haven’t gotten this all worked out yet, but I do know three things that we have to do during times of uncertainty.

1. Wait. Don’t move from where God has you. Don’t make any major decisions during this time. In other words, don’t do anything stupid.

Therefore, my brethren dearly beloved and longed for, my joy and crown, so stand fast in the Lord, my dearly beloved. Philippians 4:1

Rest in the Lord, and wait patiently for him… Psalm 37:7

2. Choose Joy. As hard as it is, choose to joy in the circumstance.  Choose joy in the midst of the uncertainty.

Rejoice in the Lord always: and again I say, Rejoice. Philippians 4:4

My brethren, count it all joy when ye fall into divers temptations;

Knowing this, that the trying of your faith worketh patience.

But let patience have her perfect work, that ye may be perfect and entire, wanting nothing. James 1:2-4

3. Stay Faithful. God hasn’t forgotten you. Know this: The work God is doing in your life and in mine is for a purpose and for a season. This time of testing and proving won’t last forever. Nobody’s testing and trials in the Bible lasted forever. The testing served its purpose, and then the trial was over. Until we have the answers, our job is to stay faithful.

And they that know thy name will put their trust in thee: for thou, Lord, hast not forsaken them that seek thee. Psalm 9:10

To every thing there is a season, and a time to every purpose under the heaven:
Ecclesiastes 3:1

This time of silence will come to an end. God is still there. He hasn’t forgotten you. He is testing you to see what is in your heart. Wait for Him to work, choose to joy in this season, and stay faithful.

Summer Book List ~ 2018

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I can’t believe that summer is upon us! I am so excited to take a break from school. For me, that means more time to READ!!

I made a summer book list of some of the best books I have read. I read pretty widely, so this list is just an assortment of some of the great books I’ve read. Any of these are a great pick to take with you on vacation, to the beach for a day, or to the backyard while you watch the kids swim.

Fiction

  1. The Beyonders Series by Brandon Mull. Brandon Mull is hands-down one of my most favorite authors. I love this series. If you like Harry Potter, give these books a try. They won’t disappoint.
  2. The Mysterious Benedict Society by Trenton Lee Stewart. I recently read the first book in this series and am looking forward to reading the rest of the series. It tells the story of four gifted children who go undercover on a dangerous mission.
  3. Tuck Everlasting by Natalie Babbitt. I only recently read this children’s classic book. It’s thought-provoking and a little sad. It’s a good read.
  4. The Secret School by Avi. This book is a quick read and enjoyable. It tells the story of a young group of students who have to take matters into their own hands when their teacher suddenly leaves for the rest of the school term.
  5. The Mark of the Thief by Jennifer Nielsen. I wasn’t too sure about this book but was quickly sucked in. Jennifer Nielson is quickly becoming a favorite author of mine.
  6. The False Prince by Jennifer Nielsen. Another book by Jennifer Nielsen, The False Prince is the first book in The Ascendance Trilogy. I really enjoyed this book. I didn’t see the twist at the end of the book coming. Book two is just as good or even better than the first one!
  7. Five Kingdoms: Sky Raiders by Brandon Mull. Another series by a favorite of mine, Brandon Mull. His books pull you in quickly and keep you on the edge of your seat. I have read the first two books in this series and can’t wait to finish the rest of them.
  8. Pride and Prejudice by Jane Austen. I have never read this classic before. Shameful, I know. Anyway, it’s been on my list of classics that I want to read. It took focus and attention to get through it. It’s not a book I could read quickly like I do other books, but I enjoyed it.
  9. The Incorrigible Children of Ashton Place by Maryrose Wood. I read this to the kids this year in school. We started it right at the end of the year and read most of it but still need to finish it. I figured I would still add it to the list. The Incorrigible children were raised by wolves and now have to be trained to fit into society.
  10. The Horse and His Boy by C.S. Lewis. Another classic well-worth the read, this book is the second book in the Chronicles of Narnia series. I hadn’t read it before, but the kids and I listened to it in school this year. It’s really good. It’s worth the read just to hear Aslan’s explanation of his involvement in the main character’s life. So good!
  11. Poppy by Avi. This quick read tells the story of a field mouse trying to outwit an owl. It’s an enjoyable read, and my kids loved it. This is book one in a series. The series is worth reading simply to meet Ereth. He is the funniest character I have encountered in children’s literature so far. He’s hilarious.
  12. The Land of Stories: The Wishing Spell by Chris Colfer. This series of books brings the fairy-tale characters we grew up with to life and continues their stories. The introduction alone will pull you right in.
  13. A Single Shard by Linda Sue Park. This book was such a good read for my kids and I. It tells the story of a young homeless boy in ancient Korea. It’s raw and incredibly sad, but it was a really good reading experience for us.

Christian

  1. Falling Free by Shannan Martin. I have so many favorite books, but this is another of them. Shannan Martin tells how she left her dream life on a farm in the country to move to the inner city and minister there. It’s a beautiful story of God’s grace.
  2. The Power of a Woman’s Words by Sharon Jaynes. This book is a great resource for women who do public speaking. It’s full of great stories and illustrations. It’s an inspiring book that reminds women how much influence our words have and how we can use them for good in this world.
  3. Nothing to Prove by Jennie Allen. The book is such a good read and an amazing reminder that we don’t have to strive to please others. For those of us who are people-pleasers and never feel like we measure up, this book is a must-read.
  4. The Magnolia Story by Chip and Joanna Gaines. For anybody who loves HGTV and loves the Gaines from Fixer Upper, this book is for you. It surprised me that it was not only a great story but also inspirational. I really enjoyed it.
  5. Wild and Free by Jess Connolly and Hayley Morgan. This book reminds us that we can live our lives free from others’ expectations and give ourselves permission to be wild and free.
  6. Church of the Small Things by Melanie Shankle. This book is surprisingly hilarious. It’s a really fun read about life, relationships, God, and how it all works together to create a beautiful story.
  7. Unglued by Lysa TerKeurst. Lysa TerKeurst is one of my favorite Christian authors. The cover pretty much says it all for this book. It’s a great read and teaches us how to deal with our emotions.
  8. Daring to Hope by Katie Davis Majors. Such a great book, this is the sequel to Katie Davis’ immensely popular Kisses from Katie. It’s raw and emotional and tells of Katie’s persevering faith in God in the midst of life’s hardships.
  9. Present Over Perfect by Shauna Niequist. Shauna is another of my favorite authors. In this book, she encourages us to focus on what’s really important in life and leave everything else behind.
  10. The Super Mom Myth by Becky Kopitzke. I really enjoyed this book. Becky encourages moms that we don’t have to be perfect or raise perfect kids to fulfill the role God wants us to be to our children, but she also encourages us to become the kind of mom God wants us to be.
  11. Unstuffed: Decluttering Your Home, Mind, and Soul by Ruth Soukup. This book is for any person who feels their home or life is chaotic and out of control. It’s inspirational and practical at the same time, which I love.
  12. Life-Giving Leadership by Julia Mateer. This book is a must-read for any woman in leadership. She gives such great insight and practical advice for leaders.
  13. So Close to Amazing by KariAnne Wood. This book is a combination of stories and DIY projects. It’s a fun, quick read that will inspire you both in your faith and in your creating abilities.
  14. Breaking Busy by Alli Worthington. This book is an encouragement to focus on God’s purpose for our lives and not to get distracted by everything else around us. 

Business

  1. Money Making Mom by Crystal Paine. I love Crystal Paine’s blog moneysavingmom.com and her other two books, so I was super excited to read this one. It’s a great book for any mom trying to decide what to do to help bring in extra income.
  2. Soar! by T.D. Jakes. This book is both a practical hands-on book as well as inspirational to help anybody get a business off the ground.
  3. Business Boutique by Christy Wright. This book is a guide for women who are interested in starting a business. It’s a nice step-by-step approach.
  4. Called to Create by Jordan Raynor. I really enjoyed this book. It’s a reminder that we are most like our Creator when we create. It’s a fascinating book filled with the stories of the companies we know and love like Chick-Fil-A, In-N-Out Burger, TOMS shoes, and many more. 
  5. The Fringe Hours by Jessica Turner. I love this book. Jessica helps women to find time in their schedules to do the things they love.

Homeschool

  1. The Well-Trained Mind by Susan Wise Bauer and Jessica Wise. For those of us are interested in classical education, this is the flagship book. The book is over 800 pages, so it’s quite a task to read. It reads quickly, though and has lots of book suggestions.
  2. The Book Whisperer by Donalyn Miller. This book motivates any parent or teacher to get children to read more books using the philosophy recommended in her book. It’s a good read and has great book suggestions.
  3. The Read-Aloud Family by Sarah MacKenzie. I absolutely love Sarah MacKenzie and her Read Aloud Revival Podcast. Her much-anticipated book just came out this year and is chock full of amazing book lists for every age!

Best Books I’ve Read (these I always recommend)

  1.  Imagine Heaven by John Burke. This amazing book will challenge the way you think about Heaven and Jesus and the future awaiting us.
  2. The Hardest Peace by Kara Tippetts. This beautiful story of God’s grace in a young mom in the midst of her hardest trial will touch you deeply. Keep the tissues handy; you will need them!
  3. The Harry Potter Series by J. K. Rowling. Obviously, this series is incredibly successful and popular and rightly so. The books are amazing works of fiction. I picked them up last summer and couldn’t put them down. I read the entire series in just a few weeks.
  4. Uninvited by Lysa TerKeurst. Another favorite of mine, I give this book away all the time as gifts. It’s an encouragement for any woman in any stage of life who feels lonely and needs to be reminded of God’s unfailing love.
  5. Kisses from Katie by Katie Davis. This book will touch your heart as you follow Katie’s story of leaving behind her life in America to love on children in Uganda and the incredible impact she has there.

Happy Summer and Happy Reading!

My Best Tips for an Effective Morning Time

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basket with candle and mug

My Morning Time Basket

We want to, but…

Most of us want to have a morning time for prayer and Bible reading every day. We really do!  We decide that we are going to do better, get up earlier, stick with it this time; but more often than not, we fail. It’s not that we don’t want to, but life happens. We’re tired, one of the kids gets sick during the night, the morning is crazy prepping for school for the day, and on and on the list goes. We know that our day goes better when we start it by spending quiet time with God, but fitting in the time is a different story!

The best way to do something consistently is to make it easy and enjoyable. I am all about simplifying! So I am sharing with you what works for me. It’s simple, to-the-point, and effective!

My Best Morning Time Tips

1. Get up early.

This one is so painful! I get it! We have a million and one excuses why we can’t get up early. Just know, you don’t have to get up at the crack of dawn. Do what works for you. All I suggest is that you get up at least half an hour earlier than your kids do. Thirty minutes of quiet time with God with no children around equals bliss!

If your kids wake up at the crack of dawn, and there is no way possible to get up ahead of them, I’ve got you covered. You can make your kids their own basket with a Bible and journal and have them do that quietly while you read your Bible. If they are super little, put a coloring book and crayons in a basket along with a Bible for them. Make it exciting for them. Make it a special time, and I promise they will look forward to it. Learn how to make kids’ morning time baskets here.

2. Light a candle.

This is the first thing I do every morning when I wake up. Lighting a candle adds a level of ambiance and enjoyment to my morning time. My favorite candles are the three-wick candles from Bath and Body Works, but my mom has recently helped me to discover Kirkland’s awesome candles. So right now, I am using those. Some mornings I skip the candle and get my essential oils diffusing. Either one works. I’m simply setting the mood for an enjoyable morning time.

3. Start with a cup of coffee or tea.

It’s such a simple step, but I am so much more awake and in a mood to learn and enjoy my morning time with God if I have a hot drink. So after I light a candle, I head to the kitchen to make coffee. While I am waiting for the coffee to brew, I take a few minutes to unload the dishwasher so it’s open for the day’s dishes.

4. Grab my Morning Time Basket

I love using a morning time basket! This keeps everything I need in one place. I buy a basket that I love. The one I am using now is from Hobby Lobby. (Gotta love Hobby Lobby!) Inside my basket, I keep my Bible, a journal for morning time, pens, notecards, another journal for creative ideas, and books I am currently reading.

5. Use a Journal for an Effective Morning Time

The most important tip for an effective morning time is to use a journal. There is a big difference between just reading your Bible for the day and reading and journaling. When you take the extra step to write down what you learned or what encouraged you, you are taking the extra time to apply what you are reading. It stays with you longer.

I have a journal that I use that Matt and I created several years ago. Eventually, I hope to make those available for sale. For now, you can use any blank journal and use your own system or borrow mine. Here is the system I have used for several years now.

**UPDATE: My Faithfully Stepping Journals are now available on Amazon!! They are a six-month journal, available in three different covers. Click HERE to order one today!

Prayer Time

There are three parts to my prayer time.

  1. Gratitude. I write down at least three things I am thankful for today.
  2. Confession. I write down my sins to confess from the day before. What did I do wrong the day before? Did I yell at my kids, snap at my husband, talk bad about somebody, have an attitude, etc?
  3. Requests. I write down the things I am praying for today.

Bible Reading

Next, in my journal, I write down what passage or passages I read in my Bible. I write down anything I learned or anything that encouraged me. Sometimes I write down a thought that encouraged me; other times I write out a verse that is a help to me.

My Tasks

I have space at the bottom of each journaling page to write down tasks I think of while I am journaling. Maybe it’s a note I need to write somebody. Other times it’s simply something I remembered I need to do and don’t want to forget. This helps me to stay focused. I can write down whatever it is that is distracting me so I don’t forget it, then I can continue with my morning time.

5. Pick a Bible study or a Bible plan to follow.

You can do anything you want for Bible reading each day. Here are some ideas to get you thinking.

  1. Read one chapter of Proverbs each day.
  2. Read a chapter from Psalms each day.
  3. Pick a Gospel (Matthew, Mark, Luke, or John) and read one chapter a day.
  4. Start in Genesis and read a chapter a day through the entire Bible.
  5. Read about and study a character from the Bible. Here are some good ones.
    • Joseph
    • Abraham
    • Esther
    • Ruth
    • David
    • Solomon
    • Moses
    • Elijah
    • Leah and Rachel
    • Joshua
    • Paul
    • Jesus
    • Lydia
    • Mary
    • Mary and Martha
  6. Read and study a book of the Bible. Here are a few of my favorite books to start with.
    • John
    • James
    • I and II Peter
    • Philippians
    • Esther
    • Ruth
    • I John
    • I and II Samuel
    • Ecclesiastes

Here is what I do each day. I read four chapters a day. First, I start with reading two chapters in Genesis, a chapter in Psalms and a chapter in Matthew. I continue that pattern until I read through the entire Bible. Then I start over again. I don’t get stuck on getting through my Bible in a year. When I finish, I just start over again.

Example:

Day 1: Genesis 1 and 2, Psalm 1, Matthew 1

Day 2: Genesis 3 and 4, Psalm 2, Matthew 2

And so on…

The Contents of My Morning Basket

So there you have it- my best tips for an awesome morning time!

The Book that Turned My Boy into a Reader

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boy holding up a book

Malachi holding his new favorite book

Trying to Turn My Boy into a Reader

I have spent the last two years trying desperately to find books that would turn my son Malachi (second grade) into a reader. We have tried Nate the Great, Encyclopedia Brown, Magic Tree House, the Key Hunters Series, and lots of other books he has had to read for school. While some of these books have sparked his interest, he doesn’t stick with them. Last year, we discovered the Billy and Blaze books, and he loves those! But our library doesn’t carry those, and I haven’t ordered anymore yet.

Our Barnes and Nobles Trip

Last year, we discovered the Billy and Blaze books, and he loves those! But our library doesn’t carry those, and I haven’t ordered anymore yet. A few months ago, we went to Barnes and Noble to get a book I have been waiting and waiting for. It’s The Read-Aloud Family by Sarah Mackenzie, and it is phenomenal! Anyway, while we were there, I did what I always do when I go to Barnes. I tried to find an interesting new book that Malachi would like to read. He picked out his usual books to look at and read- Lego books, Transformer books, etc. Don’t get me wrong, I am happy if he reads anything, but I wanted to get him into chapter books.

So I walked around as usual and pulled out a few books that I thought might interest him. I found a new one I hadn’t seen before. I pulled it off the shelf and asked Malachi to come sit by me while I read the first chapter. He reluctantly agreed. I learned this tip from Sarah Mackenzie. Sometimes you can read the first chapter out loud to get them hooked, then hand the book to your child to continue reading on their own.

Well, I did just that. I read the first two chapters while he sat next to me. When I first started reading, he wasn’t really engaged, but soon I had pulled him into the story. By the time, I finished the second chapter and closed the book, he grabbed it from my hand and said, “Can we buy it?” Success!

Success!

We bought the book and brought it home. He read it each day for school and at night-time before bed. Once he finished it, we went back to Barnes and Noble and bought the second book in the series. Soon after, we trekked back to Barnes to get the third book in the series.

These books are called The Secret of the Hidden Scrolls. A brother and sister find a mysterious scroll that transports them back to Bible times. The first scroll takes them back to the Garden of Eden and they face the serpent. The second book takes them to the ark, and the third takes them to Egypt and Moses. Malachi loves that they are fiction stories that incorporate Bible stories. He thinks that’s so cool.

Since reading these books, I haven’t had to fight with him for reading time. He has read several books since then. Just today, he read an entire Magic Tree House book Ghost Town at Sundown during rest time. I love it when I find him reading a book in his free time!

3 Tips to Turn Your Boy into a Reader

If you have an early-elementary boy giving you a hard time reading, I hear your pain! It has been a struggle! Here are just a few suggestions that are working for us.

  1. Let him read anything that interests him, even if it seems to be too young for him. I have let Malachi read Lego books, Disney Cars books, Transformer books, anything that will at least get him reading. We got him Lego Police books for his birthday. They were beneath his level, but he read them. That’s the goal. The goal is to get him to love reading.
  2. This next tip is from Sarah MacKenzie, author of The Read-Aloud Family. Try reading a chapter or two of a book first and then giving it to him to continue on his own. Reading it for him might capture his attention and bring him into the story faster than if he tried to read it on his own. It might just work that he gets hooked and has to find out for himself how it ends.
  3. Just keep trying. Don’t give up. Keep pulling all different kinds of books until you find some that interest your child.

Book Ideas for Early Elementary Boys

Here are some great book ideas to get you started.

The Billy and Blaze Series by C.S. Anderson

The Secret of the Hidden Scrolls Series by M. J. Thomas

The Tuttle Twins books by Connor Boyack

Encyclopedia Brown by Donald J. Sobol

Nate the Great Books by Marjorie Weinman Sharmat

Key Hunters Series by Eric Luper

Dragon Masters Books by Tracey West

Boxcar Children Books by Gertrude Chandler Warner

Magic Tree House Books by Mary Pope Osborne

Hank the Cowdog by John R. Erickson

I Survived Series by Lauren Tarshis

Frog and Toad Books by Arnold Lobel

The Imagination Station Series from Adventures in Odyssey

Remember: There is no such thing as a child who hates to read; there are only children who have not found the right book. —Frank Serafini

photo credit: Aaron Burden

Finding the right book makes all the difference! Here’s to happy book hunting! What books have you found that spark an interest in boys?

 

Morning Time Baskets for Kids

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New Morning Time Baskets

We decided it was time for our two older kids, Malachi (8) and Madison (6) to start doing their own Bible reading and prayer time in the mornings. They have watched Matt and I do our morning time for years and wanted to do their own. (Read my three tips for a good morning time here). So we decided to do just that.

To make it fun, we created morning time baskets similar to the one I have. We found cute baskets at Hobby Lobby in the spring shop section. Each basket was $3.99 or less for full price, but we got each one forty percent off! So they were all under $3.

bright colored baskets

Devotional Baskets

My two littles got to participate too. Each child got to pick out a basket and a journal. My two older kids each grabbed a story Bible too. They have regular Bibles at home, but I wanted them to get an easier version that they could read the stories from. We grabbed these hands-on Bibles pictured below. I absolutely love these Bibles! They are easy to read for my older two. They can pretty much read them by themselves.

Then I grab one and read it to my two littles. Every paragraph or so, there is a little hand. You stop at the hand and do whatever it says. It may be singing a little song, acting like an animal, pretending to be a tree growing, whatever goes with the story. All of my kids enjoy the fun. I can’t say enough good about these Bibles. Plus, they were a really good price. They were less than $15 each.

Blue Kids' Bible

Kids’ Bible Reader

I have my kids follow a condensed version of what I do for my morning time.

Madison journaling

Journaling

  1. First, they write down one thing they are thankful for.
  2. Then they write down one confession from the day before– something they are asking God’s forgiveness for.
  3. Lastly, they write down one thing to pray for. They can write more for any of these, but this gets them started.

Bible Reading

  1. They pick a Bible story to read for the day.
  2. When they finish, we go through the questions and application section.
  3. They write down (in their journal) one thing they learned or can apply for the day.
boy reading his Bible

Malachi reading his Bible

Finishing Up

  1. We then pray and ask God to help them have a good day and apply whatever it is they learned.
  2. Then they often choose to draw something in their journal from what they read.

    Madison’s journal entry

    kids' journal entry

    Malachi’s journal entry

     

It’s a pretty simple system, but they enjoy it. They get a mug of hot chocolate when they are doing their morning time to help make it fun and something they look forward to.

(Note: I threw in a few pieces of candy for a picture for an Easter post I wrote.)

What I Love About Morning Time Baskets

  1. Using a basket keeps all the materials needed in one place.
  2. It develops consistency and faithfulness in Bible reading and prayer at a young age.
  3. It keeps them busy when I am trying to do my own morning time.

I love these morning baskets! They have really helped shape our mornings as a family. Give it a try and see if it doesn’t transform your family’s morning as well!

 

 

Don’t Give Up on Your Heart’s Desire

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Have you ever really wanted something to happen, and it just won’t? Have you prayed and prayed for God to answer your specific prayer, and you feel that He won’t? Don’t give up! I want to give you a give some encouragement.

Our Dream to Start a Church

When Matt and I got married, we knew we wanted to be church planters. Matt was an intern at a church at the time, but our goal was to leave and start a new church. We figured it would only be about a year and a half. Four and a half years later, we were still working at the same church and the dream of starting a church seemed lost. We still had the desire, but God just wasn’t opening the door. We were so discouraged and hopeless.

Five years! That’s how long it took. It took five years for God to open the door for us to be able to leave that church and start a church in the greater Philadelphia area. We didn’t think it would ever happen, but we stayed faithful and God brought it to pass.

Waiting for Your Heart’s Desire

I don’t know how long it has been that you have been waiting for something to happen. Maybe it’s a baby, maybe you want to get married, to start your own business, to begin a ministry opportunity, to move to a new house… whatever it is, don’t give up on that dream!

Here are a few verses of encouragement to remind us not to give up on waiting for our heart’s desire.

Delight thyself also in the Lord: and he shall give thee the desires of thine heart.

Commit thy way unto the Lord; trust also in him; and he shall bring it to pass.

 And he shall bring forth thy righteousness as the light, and thy judgment as the noonday.

 Rest in the Lord, and wait patiently for him: fret not thyself because of him who prospereth in his way, because of the man who bringeth wicked devices to pass. Psalm 37:4-7 KJV

There are a few simple truths in these verses that I use over and over again to encourage myself and other women.

1. If I am truly focused on God, He will fulfill my desire, or He will change the desire.

When I delight in the Lord, He will fulfill my heart’s desire. The word delight means to receive pleasure in. When we take pleasure in developing a relationship with God, He will, in turn, fulfill our desires.

Sometimes this train of thought gets Christians tripped up. These verses don’t say that God is a vending machine, and if we put in the appropriate amount of money, exactly what we desire will come out. It’s deeper than that. If we are truly focusing on developing a better relationship with God, our desires are going to change to line up with His desires for us.

What does this look like practically? I often use these verses when talking to singles who want to be married. Either a relationship will come in time, or God will take away that desire and replace it with a desire to be single. In the mean time, they can focus on their relationship with God, while simultaneously praying and seeking out a relationship.

2. If I commit what I am doing to the Lord and entrust it to Him, He will bring it pass.

Focus on what God wants me to do whether in my life’s purpose or even just in what He has for me for the day, and let Him work out all the details.

I often quote this verse to God on a day when I am overwhelmed with a task or an event or even just a forever-long to-do list for the day. I pray through what I am trying to accomplish and surrender it to Him. Then I get to work, and God always carries me through.

3. I can be at rest while I am waiting patiently on God because I know He is working on my behalf.

The hardest thing in life is waiting. Whether it’s the little things in life like waiting in a long drive-through line, waiting to get a prescription filled, or waiting to check out at the grocery store. Or whether it’s more difficult than that… waiting for God to answer a prayer, waiting for God to heal a loved one, waiting for Him to provide financially once again. Waiting is hard. The Bible says that when a desire has not come to fruition, our heart is sick. But once the desire comes, it is a tree of life!

Proverbs 13:12 “Hope deferred maketh the heart sick: but when the desire cometh, it is a tree of life.” KJV

Waiting for God to work can make or break our faith in life’s hardest moments. When the time comes that the only answer we have is to wait for God to work, we can delight in Him, commit the problem to Him, and then sit back and wait for God to work.

 

lady sitting back at a table

photo credit: Artem Bali

 

When You Feel Like Quitting

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The Burden No One Sees

Do you ever feel like just quitting? I just wanted to write a quick note of encouragement to you as we head into the weekend. Most of us are going to wake up tomorrow, go to church, serve in various ministries, and be busy doing the work of the Lord. We all put on our game faces. We work hard on Sundays. We serve, we love on people, we give, we do our best to serve God to the best of our abilities.  But how many of us, beneath that exterior of smiling and serving, are carrying a huge burden? It’s a burden that not many people know about. It’s not something you talk about all the time, but it’s there. You have begged God to hear your prayer, but it just feels as if He doesn’t hear you. He certainly isn’t answering.

When You Feel Like Quitting

I feel your pain. I have been there; I am there. Sometimes it feels like it’s time to give up on that prayer. Maybe you feel like it’s time to walk away from it all- God, the church, your spouse, your dream, your job… I don’t know what your situation is, but I do know that it is too soon to quit. I don’t know your heartbreak, but I know the One Who does. You may feel like quitting, but I’m here to tell you- it’s too soon to quit! You have no idea how close you could be to God breaking through in your life and changing everything.

Don’t Quit

When the road you’re trudging seems all uphill,

When the funds are low and the debts are high,

And you want to smile, but you have to sigh,

When care is pressing you down a bit-

Rest if you must, but don’t you quit.

Life is queer with its twists and turns,

As every one of us sometimes learns,

And many a fellow turns about

When he might have won had he stuck it out.

Don’t give up though the pace seems slow –

You may succeed with another blow.

Often the goal is nearer than

It seems to a faint and faltering man;

Often the struggler has given up

When he might have captured the victor’s cup;

And he learned too late when the night came down,

How close he was to the golden crown.

Success is failure turned inside out –

The silver tint in the clouds of doubt,

And you never can tell how close you are,

It might be near when it seems afar;

So stick to the fight when you’re hardest hit –

It’s when things seem worst that you must not quit.

~Anonymous

girl with her hands on her head

photo credit:
Pavel L.

Book Launch Day at Our House

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four kids sitting on couch

Our book launch crew

Today is the Day!

So today is book launch day at our house! My husband Matt wrote a book called Unmasked: Overcoming the Shame that Says You’re Not Enough. It released on Amazon this morning. You can click here to get your copy. Our kids have been excited and helping as best as they can- making messes, running around the house like crazies, and taking advantage of the fact that Mom and Dad are busy for the day. You get the idea!

Dealing with Shame

Ever since Matt knew that he wanted to write a book on shame, we have spent countless hours talking about shame. We have talked about the five emotions that shame impacts-Insecurity, Indecision, Insignificance, Rejection, and Inadequacy. Matt covers all of these in his book.

We all struggle with shame in different ways in our lives. It’s so prevalent in our culture today. It’s in our churches, the workplace, our schools, pretty much everywhere. Social media certainly hasn’t helped us any. I know for me, shame has paralyzed me at times in my life from being who God created me to be and doing what He wants me to do. I have always wanted to be meek and mild, quiet, proper, and soft-spoken. Unfortunately, that’s not exactly me. I am strong-willed and opinionated. I love a challenge, and I love to be in control. Yeah… not exactly meek and mild.

Free to Be Me

For years, I struggled with being me. I felt a need to portray a certain personality, especially as a Pastor’s wife. I felt like once people got to know the real me, they didn’t like me anymore. So I hid behind the quiet, unassuming Pastor’s wife persona. That is until I would let it slip and people could see the real me. Working through Matt’s book has helped me be free to be me. I need to constantly remind myself there is no shame in being who God created me to be. I have nothing to prove to anybody else, and neither do you!

One of the things Matt talks about in his book is that the best way for us to accomplish God’s purpose for our lives is to keep our eyes on God, not on those around us. Don’t look around at what everybody else is doing. Focus on who God created you to be and what He wants you to, and the shame will fade away!

 

 

How I Use Release Writing

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photo credit: Ana Tavares

What is Release Writing?

So I think Matt may have made up the phrase “release writing,” but it totally works! We have been calling it this for years. The idea of release writing is to write down whatever it is that is bothering you until you feel a release from the building pressure. Basically, when I am overwhelmed, hurt, discouraged, frustrated, or whatever it is that I can’t wrap my mind around, I write about it. I write down everything I am feeling, thinking, experiencing, and anything else that is rolling around in my head.

When to use Release Writing?

Sometimes I release write after Matt and I have had a fight. Other times, it’s after something discouraging takes place. Sometimes it’s just a problem with our kids or a frustration in our home that we can’t seem to get past. I can process things so much better when I see it on paper in front of me instead of having it all stuck in my head. I write down every crazy thought in my head.

How does Release Writing Help?

I write until I feel like the pressure that is building inside of me is released. After the tears have flowed, after the hurt or anger has eased, after I have gotten all the frustration down on paper, then I can take a deep breath. Now I can look back through it and see what is going on. I can begin to process what happened and what I need to do next. What started the fight? Why am I so hurt? What did the friend really say, and did I respond the right way?  Was he wrong or was I? Why am I so discouraged right now? Why do I feel so helpless? Release Writing helps me to see what is going on and the steps I need to take next.

What is an Example of Release Writing?

I believe a lot of the Psalms of David were simply release writing on David’s part. We, as the readers, can see he was working through his fears, failures, problems, and discouragements simply by writing them all down. I find it so interesting that a lot of his Psalms start really negative and discouraging. By the time he has gotten to the end of the Psalm, though, his attitude turns positive again. There is something about writing that helps us to work through our emotions. It certainly helps me! Give it a try, and see if works for you too.

 

 

 

 

 

4 Ways to Encourage Yourself in the Lord

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There comes a time in every Christian’s life when you must learn to encourage yourself in the Lord. There is only so much help you can get from listening to preaching, reading an inspiring book, or listening to an uplifting song. Eventually, a time will come in your life when you are going to need something more. You are going to need God Himself to encourage you. It is a time when the trial is so great, the pain so intense, that your hope is gone. This is exactly where we find David in I Samuel 30.

David’s Hopeless Situation

For a time, David and his men and their families lived in the city of Ziklag. David and his men left to go help fight in a battle. They ended up not being needed in the war, so they returned home. Upon their arrival, they are met with an awful scene. The fierce Amalekites have invaded Ziklag, taken all the women and children captive, and burned the city with fire.

So David and his men came to the city, and, behold, it was burned with fire; and their wives, and their sons, and their daughters, were taken captives.

Then David and the people that were with him lifted up their voice and wept, until they had no more power to weep.

And David’s two wives were taken captives, Ahinoam the Jezreelitess, and Abigail the wife of Nabal the Carmelite.

 And David was greatly distressed; for the people spake of stoning him, because the soul of all the people was grieved, every man for his sons and for his daughters: but David encouraged himself in the Lord his God. I Samuel 30:3-6

David’s Encouragement

The men with him were in such shock and grief that they spoke of stoning David, their beloved leader. David is in an awful place. He is grieving for his own loss, and now he must face his men who are angry with him and want to kill him.

David did the only thing he knew to do, he turned to God. This was his habit, his go-to in bad situations. In the midst of loss and fear, David took time to give himself courage by spending time with  God.

How do you encourage yourself in the Lord? Matt and I have this outstanding joke that when the Bible talks about encouraging yourself in the Lord, it refers to having Mexican food. We are pretty sure that when David encouraged himself in the Lord, he went and ate Mexican food– some fajitas with chips and salsa and guac. Maybe not, but I have found a few things that have worked for me over the years.

4 Ways to Encourage Yourself in the Lord

  1. First I pray. I talk to God about everything that is on my mind– my burdens, hurts, frustrations, and pressures. I talk to Him honestly and openly about my problems and ask for His help.
  2. Next, I read my Bible and journal. If I need encouragement, I turn to Psalms or the Gospels. I spend time reading God’s words and just let Him speak to me. I have a journal that I use every day for my morning time with God, and I use that to write down what encourages me.
  3. Then I release write. For this, I use a different journal. I have a journal specifically for release writing. In it, I write out my frustration, exasperation, hurt, pain, whatever it is. I write it all down and get it out of my head. I find this helps me to be able to process what I am dealing with instead of just letting it roll around in my head, paralyzing me from moving forward.
  4. Lastly, I do something that encourages my spirit. I might go for a quiet walk, read an uplifting book, or listen to an encouraging podcast or good music.

These steps don’t fix the situation, but they give me the encouragement I need to keep moving forward. What about you? How do you encourage yourself in the Lord?