Author Archives: Amanda Manney

About Amanda Manney

Hi friend, thanks for stopping by! I'm Amanda. I am a pastor's wife and a homeschooling mom who has a passion to encourage women to faithfully step every day into what God has for them.

Six Steps to Finding God’s Purpose for Your Life

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The Confusion Surrounding Finding God’s Purpose

Finding God’s purpose for our lives is like finding the holy grail. Pastors preach on it, teachers teach about it, Christians talk about it… but nobody tells you how to find it. It’s one of the most confusing topics in churches. Most people don’t know how to find God’s purpose for their lives, but all of us recognize when somebody else has found theirs.

When you cross paths with somebody who lives their life accomplishing what God created them to do, it’s contagious. You want to be around them. You want to be apart of what God is doing in their life. So how do we figure out God’s purpose for our lives?

Paul’s Understanding of His Purpose

Before we tackle finding God’s purpose, it is crucial for us to understand that everybody’s purpose in life is different. We can absolutely not compare what God wants us to do with what anybody else is doing. Paul understood this clearly. In II Timothy 4:7, he says,

“I have fought a good fight, I have finished my course, I have kept the faith:”

Paul says, I have fought a good fight, and I have kept the faith. When he talks about fighting a good fight and keeping the faith, he uses the words a and the. When he talks about his course, however, he makes it personal. He uses the word my. “I have finished my course.” This tiny word makes a huge difference. Paul understood that his course was different from everybody else’s. He recognized that God had given him a purpose and plan for life that couldn’t be compared to anybody else’s, and Paul didn’t. He focused solely on what God wanted him to accomplish.

A Simple Six-Step Process

If we could latch on to Paul’s idea, we would find so much more peace in our lives. God has created us all uniquely and gifted us differently. If we were all the same, God wouldn’t need each one of us. The fact that you and I are still on this earth and not in Heaven means that God has a special plan for our lives. He has gifted you and me specifically for what he wants us to accomplish. Your purpose will be unlike anybody else’s. We can not compare ourselves to anyone else. Even someone who is in the same line of work as you will be gifted slightly different to be able to accomplish their purpose differently than you.

A Simple Formula

If we spend our lives comparing ourselves and our lives to others, we are wasting the gifts God has given us. It’s time to stop looking around at others and focus on looking inside ourselves at how God has gifted us and wants us to use those gifts to accomplish His purpose in our lives. How do we do that? We can use simple questions and action steps to help us figure out our purpose.

How has God gifted me- what talents do I have?
What abilities have I developed over the years?
What is my personality?
What am I passionate about?
How can I take the answers to the above questions and combine them to meet a need in other people’s lives?
Write down your two or three top choices. Pray about those options. Talk to other close family and friends and get their opinion on your choices. What do they see as a natural fit for you?

Now the formula is simple, but the process may take some time. That’s okay. Take the time to really think through your answers. If you find the answer to number 5, you can begin to find God’s purpose for your life. Don’t overcomplicate it. God only gave you so many talents, passions, and opportunities to grow your abilities. He did that to point you in the direction of what He wants you to do with your life.

Free Worksheet Download

To work through the above process, I have created a worksheet you can download here.

Once you work through this process, it may mean you need to make some changes in your life. Read my 3 Ways to Stay Flexible and Be Ready for a Change. Give yourself time and allow God to lead you.

An Additional Resource

One of the books that really helped me when I was trying to work through this process was Fringe Hours: Making Time for You by Jessica Turner.

When we find out what God wants us to accomplish with our lives, we become unstoppable. We get out of bed, excited for the day and ready to work. Is every day perfect? No. Do hard days still come? Yes; but we will have the motivation and drive to keep us moving forward.

waves on the beach — photo credit: Sean O.

Love the Life You Have, Not the Life You Want

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Focusing on What You Don’t Have

We have the greatest of comparisons in our backyard. When you stand on our deck and look into our backyard, you can look straight ahead and see our four kids playing in a ten-foot-long, 18-inch deep blow-up pool. If you look just to the left into the neighbor’s yard, you will see an immaculate above ground pool surrounded by a large deck. Their pool is beautiful and always crystal clear. Ours is usually dirty and has grass and bugs floating in it, no matter how many times we empty it out and fill it up again.

Do you know what the biggest difference is though? Our pool is full of life and laughter. The kids play in it all day long, laughing, yelling, and having fun. Our neighbor’s pool on most days sits empty. Once in a while, their granddaughter comes over and swims all by herself in the large pool. Madison invited her to come and play in our pool, but she only stayed for about five minutes. Why would you stay and play in a tiny pool when you can swim in your own huge pool?

A Life Lesson from My Kids

Looking at the neighbor’s beautiful pool this spring when we moved in, I was heartbroken for our kids. They have always wanted a big pool, and we moved in right next to one. I thought they would be sad, but I have been amazed that it doesn’t seem to bother them. They are too focused on their own pool to waste time thinking about the beautiful pool next door. Learning from them, I made a commitment to God to focus on the life I have right now, not the life I want. Sure, we need to bring up our income, we need to move into a larger house before the kids get older and much more. But right now? Right now, I get to stand at my kitchen sink washing dishes and watch my kids hav a blast swimming in a small pool. That’s the life I have right now, and I love it!

I hope you are having as great a summer as we are. If you missed it, be sure to read my 3 Keys to Having a Productive Summer. This summer, love the life you have, not the one you want!

Three out of four taking a break from the pool to eat lunch.

3 Keys to Having a Productive Summer

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Summer Break

Because I homeschool during the school year, I take summer break really seriously. I look forward to it, probably more so than my kids. I set goals I want to accomplish, projects I want to complete, books I want to read, and more. We only take off the months of June and July for summer break. To accomplish everything I want to, I have to be strategic. I have found three keys that work for me to have a productive summer.

Key #1: Make a List of Goals

Before summer starts, I write down my goals for what I want to accomplish. Summer goes so fast! If I don’t take the time to write down my goals, summer will be over and I won’t have accomplished anything I wanted to. So before summer started, Matt and I used one of our date nights to write down what we want to accomplish personally and what we want to do as a family.

Key 2: Make a Daily Schedule for the Kids and One For You

I know that if I want to get anything accomplished this summer, my kids need to know what to do and when to do it. Otherwise, they will drive me crazy all day with… What can I do? I’m bored. What’s for lunch? What’s for supper? Can we go outside now? We made a summer schedule and placed it on the refrigerator so the kids know what they can do all throughout the day. We are a few weeks into our schedule, and it seems to be working really well for us. Instead of them coming to me every two seconds, they go look at what they should be doing.

If you are interested, you can see our kids’ schedule here and my personal schedule here. You can also print off your own summer schedule to fill in here. If you check out our schedules, you will see that Sunday and Monday are not on there. On Sundays we have church, and Monday is a Sabbath Day for us.

Key 3: Make a Meal Plan

One of the keys to sticking with the schedule is to have my menu planned out for the week. If I don’t, I will spend valuable time trying to figure out the next meal or fielding questions about it. I use this simple menu printable from iheartplanners.com. You can access it here. I printed off several copies on different colored paper. I fill in a new one each week on Sunday. It makes such a difference! Our days have run so much smoother since incorporating a meal plan that the kids and I can see.

These three keys have made a difference already in our summer. Use these three keys to give you and your kids the most productive summer yet!

3 Ways to Stay Flexible and Be Ready for Change

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Traveling in College

When I was in college, I traveled around the country on a musical team representing my school. I played the piano for our group, and we performed at a different church every Sunday. One of the leaders who traveled with us had a saying, “Flexibility is the key to ministry.” If she said it once, she said it a thousand times. She desperately wanted us to understand that leaders must stay flexible with changing times, people, and situations. With decades of ministry behind her, she knew all too well that life has a way of changing when you least expect it.

I understood this concept in a small way in college, but over a decade in ministry has helped me to clearly understand what she was trying to teach us. The best leaders are the ones who can adapt and change to the people, times, culture, and ideas around them. They don’t hang on to the past, unable to change and adapt and move into the future.

Allowing God to Redirect Us

Sometimes God completely redirects us. Maybe it’s a career change, a move, a new relationship, a loss, a painful experience, or something else completely. God has a habit of shaking things up in our lives when we least expect it. If you would have asked me a year ago to foresee some of the changes God took our family through last year, I would have been shocked. I had no idea that the bottom would fall out for us both in our ministry and in our personal lives. I had no idea we would go for months on end without getting paid, endure depression and discouragement like we never had before, face the pain of potentially walking away from the church we started seven years ago, and having to sell our home and move.

Holding Loosely to My Plans

I have learned over the past several years that the best way for me to succeed in life is to find what it is that God wants me to do and follow it wholeheartedly. View the talents and abilities, dreams and desires He has given me as a compass to point me towards what He wants me to accomplish. The struggles of this past year taught me that I also have to hold on to those plans and dreams with a loose hand and allow God to change my direction and plans at any time because He will do that when we least expect it!

King Solomon teaches us this principle in Proverbs. Proverbs 16:9 says, “A man’s heart deviseth his way: but the LORD directeth his steps.” (KJV) The Message paraphrases it this way, “We plan the way we want to live, but only God makes us able to live it.” (MSG)

Proverbs 16:9 says, “A man’s heart deviseth his way: but the LORD directeth his steps.” (KJV) The Message paraphrases it this way, “We plan the way we want to live, but only God makes us able to live it.” (MSG)

3 Ways to Stay Flexible and Allow for Change

How can we accomplish our goals and dreams and yet be flexible enough for God to be able to move or redirect us?

Keep a tender heart. Keep a clean heart and conscience before God. Forgive people who do you wrong. Don’t get a hard heart with people or situations that disappoint you. God may be allowing those painful situations in your life to move you in a different direction. If Matt and I hadn’t battled every day to keep a tender heart, we would have walked away from ministry this past year.
Develop a consistent morning time routine. Spend time every morning praying, reading the Bible, and journaling. We can’t expect God to direct us if we aren’t spending time with Him. He will use His Word and time in prayer to show us and direct us into what He has for us. My morning time was a lifeline for me this past year. If I hadn’t spent years developing the habit of reading my Bible every morning, journaling, and praying, I would have given up. If you would like some ideas for developing a consistent morning time, read my best tips for an effective morning time.
Continue growing and learning. Spend time reading good books, listening to podcasts, and growing. So many times a podcast I listened to or a book I read helped me to stay faithful, keep moving forward, and make the changes I needed to. It is so much easier for God to redirect us and change us when we are in the habit of growing and learning. If you need book or podcast suggestions, here are a few of my favorites.

Staying Flexible and Be Ready for Change

If we keep a tender heart, spend each morning connecting with God, and allow God to change our thinking by reading good books and listening to good podcasts, we are as ready as we can be for God to interrupt our life and send us in a new direction. Don’t hold so tightly to your ideas, your plans, or your dreams that you can’t let God redirect you and point you in the new direction He wants you to go.

What We’ve Been Up To- Moving

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A Big Decision

If you follow me online, you have probably noticed I have been absent online since Christmas. Let me catch you up on what we’ve been doing. We started out the year with a bang! In January, we decided it was time for us to make a move. We took a really heavy pay cut last year in the middle of the year. After several months of scrambling, cutting back, picking up extra hours, and more, we decided we needed to bring down our mortgage payments. Our goal was to cut our mortgage in half. So with that in mind, the second week of January we decided to begin the process of selling our home and moving.

We made a call to a realtor friend of ours, and we were off. Our house needed a ton of work, so we got to work. We painted everything in sight. I told Matt if the kids stood still too long, they would get painted. We redid a bathroom, ripped out carpet, put in new carpet, redecorated and staged the house, cleaned out our basement, and packed up most of the house. It was a crazy six weeks. We headed into open house weekend with lots of prayers and our fingers crossed.

Selling Our Home, Moving, and a Wedding

After a Saturday and Sunday open house with around sixty people showing up, we came away with multiple offers and a bidding war. We officially accepted a bid on Monday night after the open houses. Then all the craziness started with looking for a new house, inspections, appraisals, paperwork, and all that messy stuff. We pushed through all of that and began the moving process. We moved into our new home the second week of April. After just a few days of settling in, we hit the road to head to Illinois for my younger sister’s wedding. We got to spend lots of time with family and friends, laughing, having fun together, and helping to decorate for the wedding.

Here’s a few pictures from the wedding…

wedding picture of bride and groom — My beautiful little sister marrying her best friend.

four kids in wedding outfits — Our four kids all ready for the wedding.

two sisters dressed for a wedding — My older sister and I getting ready for the wedding.

Back to Normal Life

After that, we started the trip home and stopped in Pittsburgh for a few days for some much-needed downtime to relax and have some fun together. Now we are back home, finishing the year homeschooling, and looking forward to summer break!

family photo — Enjoying our time in Pittsburgh.

Christmas Family Series- #2

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Do you ever feel like the holidays fly by without fitting any meaningful family time in? I have in my mind all the things I want to do as a family for the holiday season, but all of a sudden January hits and we didn’t get to any of it.

A few years ago, Matt and I talked and decided to do something about it. We decided to be more intentional about the holidays. I knew if we were going to fit more into our schedule, I had to find ideas that were simple and easy. I started trying to find ways to incorporate more quality family time in during the holiday season. We have several things now that we do as a family each year that I want to share over the next few weeks. Here we go!

Idea #2: Looking at Lights

This idea is super easy. Load all the kids into the car, turn on the Christmas music, and drive around looking at Christmas lights. We try to do this several times during the Christmas season. Sometimes we drive through McDonald’s and get hot chocolate for everybody.

It doesn’t sound spectacular, but it’s so much fun for the kids, especially when they are not expecting it. We love to surprise them. Sometimes we wait until the kids are in pajamas and ready for bed; then we tell everyone to grab a coat and put on their shoes. Chaos ensues. Everybody runs around grabbing coats and shoes. We all pile into the van and take off. We don’t stay out long- maybe about twenty minutes or so. It’s just long enough to spend some meaningful time together as a family.

Creating family time in the midst of a busy season doesn’t have to take a lot of time or money. It just takes a little creativity and planning to sneak it into a busy schedule. We won’t ever regret the effort it takes to spend more time with our family. Our kids won’t be with us forever, so we have to create the memories while we can!

Family Christmas Series: #1 Reading Basket

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Idea #1: Christmas Reading Basket

Create a Christmas reading basket. I got this idea two years from Sarah Mackenzie and her podcast, “The Read-Aloud Revival.” I love this idea! We created a book basket for the month of December. I like it so much, we might continue it into next year.

Our Christmas book basket

Place a large basket somewhere visible and fill it with Christmas books. I went to my library and checked out all the best Christmas and winter books I could find! Lots of our books are by Jan Brett. We just love her books, and she has several winter and Christmas books! Whenever it’s time to read, I choose one child to go pick out a book from the basket and we get to read it together as a family.

Some of our favorites from our last library run

Finding Extra Time to Read

We try to find extra time each day to read. We might read the book before bedtime, after dinner at the table, in the morning after breakfast, in the car as we travel somewhere, or at some other random time. I love the time we spend reading a good book together as a family. Sometimes the kids sit and color and listen as I read. Other times, they just sit and look at the pictures.

We have enjoyed so many great Christmas books together as a family! It’s an easy way to fit in extra family time. Everybody enjoys it and it only takes a few minutes to pull off and absolutely no prep time! That’s a win in my book.

Choosing to Spend Time Doing What Matters Most

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Our kids playing in the leaves

Beautiful Fall Days

It’s fall! That means beautiful days, trees bursting with color, pumpkin lattes, apple picking at the orchard, apple cider donuts, and all the wonderful things fall brings.

Last week, we were crazy busy. I had more to accomplish on my to-do list each day than I could possibly accomplish. But as I looked out the window, I saw it was an incredibly gorgeous fall day. The sun hadn’t been out in days, but now it was shining and the trees were full of color.

I looked at my phone and saw that we weren’t going to have another sunny day for over a week. I started wondering if we should cancel our plans for the day and go outdoors and enjoy the great fall day God created.

Wisdom from My Morning Time

I was undecided until I had my morning time. I read in Ecclesiastes a few verses that encouraged my heart.

And also that every man should eat and drink, and enjoy the good of all his labour, it is the gift of God. Ecclesiastes 3:13

Live joyfully with the wife whom thou lovest all the days of the life of thy vanity, which he hath given thee under the sun, all the days of thy vanity: for that is thy portion in this life, and in thy labour which thou takest under the sun. Ecclesisastes 9:9

For all this I considered in my heart even to declare all this, that the righteous, and the wise, and their works, are in the hand of God:… Ecclesiastes 9:1

3 Lessons from Solomon

1. The gift of God is working hard and enjoying the fruits of our labor. What’s the point in working hard every day if you never take a day off? What’s the point of earning money if we can’t spend it doing something together as a family?

2. My spouse and children are gifts from God to be enjoyed in this life. I have to choose to spend time with them while I still can. We are not promised tomorrow, and our children won’t be with us forever. In the blink of an eye, they will be out of our home and on their own. We have to make conscious decisions to spend time putting into them, noticing them, and having fun with them while we can.

3. Our lives are in God’s hand. Our jobs, our pay, our careers, everything we work so hard for is in God’s hand. Taking a day off isn’t going to change that.

Choosing to Spend Time Doing What Really Matters

So, what did we do? We packed the kids in the van and drove an hour and a half away to beautiful Lancaster, PA. We went to our favorite orchard and bought pink lady apples, we discovered a new park surrounded by the most gorgeous fall trees, and we found some leaves to play in. But mostly, we simply enjoyed spending time together as a family.

Sometimes we need to step away from work, take a break from the never-ending to-do list, and just choose to spend time together. We will never regret the time we spend together as a family!

God Uses Trials to Develop Iron in our Souls

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photo credit: Kalen Emsley

Deserts and Prisons

We can’t always make sense of what God is doing in our lives. Sometimes, though, we can begin to see a pattern in the way God deals with people. In the Bible, God sent people to prisons and deserts. Joseph, John the Baptist, Jeremiah, and Paul all went to prison and Moses, Elijah, and David spent time in the desert. A desert and a prison have the same effect– you are cut off from everything you know, the comforts you are used to, and thrown into an entirely new set of circumstances, totally dependent on God.

It’s in the prisons and deserts of life that we learn an entirely new way of depending on God. It’s the place where God begins to show us more of Himself. It was in the desert that God called Moses from the burning bush to return to Egypt and free the Israelites. God revealed the next stage of Elijah’s ministry to him during his time in the desert. When Jeremiah was imprisoned, God spoke to him and gave him the amazing words we comfort ourselves with still today.

Call unto me, and I will answer thee, and show thee great and mighty things, which thou knowest not. Jeremiah 33:3

Job’s Story

We see another example of this in the book of Job. While Job’s story doesn’t take him to a literal prison, his circumstances were similar. God took away everything from Job and left him destitute. Job gets to know God in an entirely new way. Job no longer knew about God, he knew God personally. At the end of his trial, Job had this to say.

I have heard of thee by the hearing of the ear: but now mine eye seeth thee. Job 42:5

Captivity

There’s an interesting verse at the end of the book of Job that captured my attention recently.

And the LORD turned the captivity of Job, when he prayed for his friends: also the LORD gave Job twice as much as he had before. Job 42:10

I think it is so interesting that God calls Job’s testing captivity. It gives us a glimpse into the way God deals with us in trials and testings. The word captivity we can understand. It’s the idea of being a prisoner. God allowed Job to be a prisoner during his time of testing. The time of testing came to an end, and God restored Job’s wealth to him and gave him more children.

What brought about the end of Job’s testing? What happened to Job that God said, “Ok, that’s enough. You passed the test.”?

Iron in Our Soul

I’m not completely sure but I think David may give us a glimpse of it in the Psalms. There’s a really interesting verse in Psalm 105 that talks about Joseph’s time of testing.

He sent a man before them, even Joseph, who was sold for a servant:

Whose feet they hurt with fetters: he was laid in iron:

Until the time that his word came: the word of the LORD tried him. Psalm 105:17-19

The phrase he was laid in iron literally means “his soul came into iron.” He developed iron in his soul. Joseph was not the same person when God finished testing him. What does it mean to have iron in your soul? It carries the idea of spiritual “toughening up.” God knows that we can’t stay the way we are and hope to serve Him faithfully for a lifetime. Life is just too hard. So He sends us into captivity, times of testing to toughen us up, so we will stay faithful in the long run.

Times of Iron Strengthening

I know in my life personally, Matt and I are not the same people we were when we started our church seven years ago. God has used these years of testing to toughen us up, not to have a hard heart but a tough skin. Matt often says that we need to keep a tender heart but grow a thick skin. The ministry is tough. People can be cruel. God does things we don’t understand. If we want to get through all that, we have to keep a tender heart to the Lord but toughen up a little bit. We can’t let hurtful comments, bad days, and heartbreak keep us from what we know the Lord called us to do.

I don’t know what you are going through, but I know that God allows times in our lives when we are held captive and tested beyond what we think we can manage so that He can put iron in our souls.

A Heart of Iron

Two dear friends of mine are in such a time right now. They both have cancer and are clinging to God during this time. They are totally dependent on God as their worlds have come crashing down. As I pray for them and hurt for them, I am watching the iron process taking place. Somehow they are stronger than they were when they started; they have more faith and grace than what they started with. I am watching as God takes them through this process and is refining them and changing them.

I wonder if that’s what Pharoah saw in Joseph when Joseph stood before him in the palace. He saw a man fresh from prison, but he saw in this young man a heart of iron.

My challenge to you and to myself is to not give up and throw in the towel. God is at work refining us. It’s in this refining process that we get to know Him in an entirely new way. It’s in these difficult times of testing that God is developing iron in our soul so that we can stay faithful for a lifetime.

Fall Mornings Make the Best Mornings

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Fall Mornings and Candles

Fall is here, and that means two of my favorite things- fall mornings and fall candles. I love getting up early on a cool fall morning, and I love fall candles! My favorite scents in my home right now are pumpkin cupcake, pumpkin apple, vanilla pumpkin marshmallow, pumpkin patch, spiced pecan, and caramel corn.

Morning Time Routine

Fall is the best time to incorporate a morning time routine. The kids are back in school, schedules are more structured, and the mornings are beautiful. There is nothing more perfect than a fall morning with a cup of coffee in hand, a candle burning, and a quiet time to pray, read the Bible, and journal.

If you have been wanting to start a morning time routine, this is a great time to get started. Each year, I use September and October to reboot my morning time routine. Usually, during the summer, I get a little sloppy with my routine. By the time fall comes, I am ready to get back at it. If you want to get back in the swing of things, follow these quick steps and you can be ready to get back to that morning time routine.

Quick Reboot

1. Buy a candle. Bath and Body Works and Kirklands are my favorite places to buy candles. Pick one that you love and brings a smile to your face.

2. Find a journal. I use my journal to write down my prayer list for the day and what I read and learned during my Bible reading time. I find I learn so much more when I use a journal than when I just read my Bible.

3. Pick a Bible study or reading plan. There are so many Bible reading plans to choose from. A quick way to get started is to read a Psalm or a Proverb a day, read one chapter of John each day, or choose a Bible study from the YouVersion app.

4. Pick a book to read. I try to read a chapter from a book each day when I am done with my Bible reading and journaling. Here are a few good reads if you are looking for one.

Everybody Always by Bob Goff.

Falling Free: Rescued From the Life I Always Wanted by Shannan Martin.

Nothing to Prove: Why We Can Stop Trying So Hard by Jennie Allen.

You Are Free: Be Who You Already Are by Rebekah Lyons

Kisses from Katie by Katie Davis

5. Just start. The best way to get into a morning time routine is to just start doing it and continue each day. You will find an excuse every day, but choose to overcome those excuses and stick to your morning time routine each day.

If you are looking for more details on developing a morning time routine, read my post My Best Tips for an Effective Morning Time. With just a little bit of work, mornings can be the best part of our day!