Tag Archives: value

A Virtual Hug from Me to You

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a virtual hug from a bear

A Virtual Hug

I can’t believe we’re already halfway through January. While some people are off to an amazing start and crushing it with accomplishing their goals, others are struggling big time. I’ve had conversations with three different women over the course of the last week all of whom are struggling. They feel like life is crushing them. Each of them is in different circumstances, and each of their stories is different. Yet, I found myself saying the same thing to each of them—There is nothing wrong with you.

I don’t know if you’re struggling right now. I have no idea what you’re going through, but I know we can all find encouragement in being reminded that we are valued. If I could, I would give you a hug. But since I’m not near you and the whole hugging thing is kind of nixed right now because of Covid, I want to give you a virtual hug.

So consider this a hug from me as I remind you of a few simple truths today.

1. Your value is not in what you can do, it’s in who you are.

Too many of us focus on what we do. We feel we are only valuable when we put something out into the world or accomplish something great. Yet, that’s not true at all. If you never accomplished anything else for the rest of your life, you would still be of value simply because you are you.

Are not two sparrows sold for a farthing? and one of them shall not fall on the ground without your Father. But the very hairs of your head are all numbered. Fear ye not therefore, ye are of more value than many sparrows.

Matthew 10:29-31

2. You can not do anything to make God love you any more; neither can you do anything to make Him love you any less.

Sometimes we forget that Jesus’ love for us has no boundaries or conditions. We get so hard on ourselves. I feel like that’s our specialty as women—being hard on ourselves. We need to let go of the expectations we have for ourselves and simply rest in the knowledge that God loves us just as we are, and that’s enough.

Observe how Christ loved us. His love was not cautious but extravagant. He didn’t love in order to get something from us but to give everything of himself to us. Love like that.

Ephesians 5:2 MSG

3. There is nothing wrong with you.

You were lovingly crafted by a perfect Creator. To criticize yourself is to criticize the Creator. He made you exactly as He wanted you to be. So take comfort and joy in that. Be who God made you to be without apologizing for it.

That means we will not compare ourselves with each other as if one of us were better and another worse. We have far more interesting things to do with our lives. Each of us is an original.

Galatians 5:26 MSG

Wherever you are today, I wish I could reach out and hug you and share these truths personally. Instead, let this be your virtual hug as I remind you that you are valuable, God loves you just as you are, and there is nothing wrong with you.

For more encouragement, read Encouragement for the Weary Soul.

A great book to make you laugh is Have More Fun: How to be Remarkable, Stop Feeling Stuck, and Start Enjoying Life by Mandy Arioto.

3 Truths You Need to be Reminded of This Christmas

Macey and Me at the Hershey store

Four Suicides Too Many

Overall, Christmas 2020 looks a little different than any other year. This year has been a year like no other. Some people have been able to continue on as if nothing ever happened, and others have had their lives literally torn apart. I started a file of pictures on my phone of people that we know that have taken their lives this year. Right now, I have four pictures in that file. That’s four lives too many; four lives cut short way too soon. My heart breaks every time I look at those photos.

I keep those photos because I don’t want to forget the huge impact this year has had on some people. Unsurprisingly, this year, more than any other year, we have dealt with divorce, infidelity, depression, and suicide more than any other year in our ministry.

3 Truths Somebody Needs to Hear From You

I say all that to encourage you with this— Don’t underestimate the power of a kind word this season. This year more than ever, we need to remind the people in our lives of these three truths:

  • They are loved.
  • They have value.
  • They are needed.

If you’re not struggling this year or this season, use your strength to help someone else. Give your love to somebody this Christmas. Write a card, call someone just to let them know you are thinking of them, cook a meal for a family, send flowers, do Christmas for a family. If you look around, you won’t find it hard to find someone who needs extra love and encouragement this Christmas season.

3 Truths You Need to Hear

Maybe you are at a place where you need to hear these truths yourself. Maybe you are the one who needs to hear these truths. So, let me repeat them.

  • You are loved.
  • You have value.
  • You are needed.

Don’t believe the lie of the devil that your family would be better off without you. We’ve been there too many times to pick up the pieces after a suicide. Let me tell you—the family and friends left behind have never been better off. Their hearts and lives are beyond devastated, and they aren’t sure if they will ever be whole again.

Whatever you are dealing with or going through right now, I know with one hundred percent certainty that your family is not better without you. They need you. They can’t do life without you.

More Encouragement

Two of the Christmas songs that I am loving this year are Hope is Here by Building 429 and Behold Him by Francesca Battistelli. Both songs came out within the last month or two. Listen to the words and let them encourage your heart as they have mine.

For more posts like this, read Now is Probably Not the Time and What Now?

**With a post like this, I feel that I need to say that if you are seriously struggling with depression or suicidal thoughts, please get the help you need. Get professional help. There is no shame in that. We all need extra help sometimes.


I Have Nothing To Prove

(Note: The link in this post is an affiliate link, and I will be compensated when you make a purchase by clicking on my link. Please read my disclosure policy here.)

nothing to proveTrying to Prove My Worth

I just finished reading the book Nothing to Prove: Why We Can Stop Trying So Hard by Jennie Allen. It was such a great book! The title alone says it all!

I have spent so many years of my life trying to prove my worth, trying to measure up to the next person, trying to find my value in what I do. After years of trying and failing, I have finally come to realize– It’s not going to happen. I am never going to measure up to somebody else because I am not them. I am me, and I am learning to be okay with that.

There is so much peace to be found when we finally realize and live like we have nothing to prove. In her book, Jennie says,

So many of our problems come when imperfect people try to act as if they have it all together…We hide behind images we create of happy, clean, impressive lives. We are exhausted. Because if you create an image to hide behind, you’ll have to spend all your energy holding it up.

It is the simple things that will change the world… You do the simple work of loving God and loving people. It is messy, hard, not too glamorous. And that sounds like Jesus.

If you are tired of trying to measure up and live up to everybody else’s standards, then I highly recommend this book. It’s an invitation to look at life from a completely new point of view– one that realizes you can stop trying so hard because you have absolutely nothing to prove!

We All Need Worth

I think most people struggle to understand that they have worth and value, but I know women especially struggle with it. I know I sure do. So my husband’s message on Sunday was an encouragement to my heart. Here is  a recap of his message.

How We Define Our Worth

From an early age, we learn to define our worth through four ways.

  1. Through our appearance– how we look.
  2. Through other people’s approval– who we please.
  3. Through attention– who is looking at me?
  4. Through our activity– what I do.

We try our entire lives to find our worth through improving our appearance, trying never to displease anyone, trying to always be the center of attention, and competing with everyone around us. This just creates a lot of stress for ourselves and those around us.

The only way to discover your WORTH is to discover your WHY.

How God Defines Our Worth

Romans 8:28-31

28 And we know that all things work together for good to them that love God, to them who are the called according to his purpose.

29 For whom he did foreknow, he also did predestinate to be conformed to the image of his Son, that he might be the firstborn among many brethren.

30 Moreover whom he did predestinate, them he also called: and whom he called, them he also justified: and whom he justified, them he also glorified.

31 What shall we then say to these things? If God be for us, who can be against us?

God has a plan for each of our lives, and He is working every day to accomplish that plan. When we begin to understand that truth, we begin to work with Him and not against Him. We exist to reflect the goodness of Jesus through our identity, relationships, and the worth we bring to other’s lives. We find our worth because of the value we bring to other people’s lives.

We showed this video clip on Sunday. It’s a great example of someone who has found their purpose (their why) and because of that, knows her worth. This is Joanna Gaines from HGTV’s show Fixer Upper.