Advice, Wisdom, and Avoiding Heartbreak

Asking for Advice

Have you ever had somebody ask your advice on something, and you readily give it only to find out later that they already had their mind set on what they wanted to do? How did it make you feel? Frustrated, right?

We had this happen recently. Somebody asked Matt and I how we felt about a decision they were going to make. Matt and I both agreed it wasn’t a wise decision. We talked to this person for at least an hour or so and felt confident in the fact they had heard and would heed our advice.

Rejecting that Advice

However, a few weeks later, that same person came to us and told us they had done exactly what we advised them not to do. We both just sat there for a moment, stunned. What do you say? We didn’t agree with the decision, but they already knew that. Yet, they ignored our advice and went ahead with their decision anyway.

Situations like these are so disheartening. We can foresee a decision someone is about to make and the heartbreak it’s going to cause. Yet, we are helpless to do anything to change it.

There’s a story in the book of Jeremiah about a group of people that had a plan in mind; all they needed was for the prophet to give his blessing on their plan. Reading the story and knowing all the details now, I wonder why they even bothered asking the prophet for his advice anyway. They were going to do what they were going to do whether he told them they should or not.

The People’s Request

We pick up the story in Jeremiah 42. Judah has been seized by Babylon. Most of the people were taken into captivity, and the city has been burned and destroyed. There was, however, a small remnant of people left in the city. Jeremiah, the prophet, is part of that remnant still in Judah.

The few people that are left come to Jeremiah and ask him to pray to his God to show them what they should do next.

They said, “Please pray to the Lord your God for us. As you can see, we are only a tiny remnant compared to what we were before. Pray that the Lord your God will show us what to do and where to go.”

Jeremiah 42:2,3 NLT

Jeremiah’s Response

Jeremiah agrees and tells them that he will tell them everything God says. Ten days later, God gives Jeremiah the answer. God tells them that they need to stay in the land, even though they feel like they’d be safer going to Egypt. Furthermore, if they do move to Egypt, they won’t survive.

Yet before the words are even out of Jeremiah’s mouth, they argue with him.

When Jeremiah had finished giving this message from the Lordtheir God to all the people,  Azariah son of Hoshaiah and Johanan son of Kareah and all the other proud men said to Jeremiah, “You lie! The Lord our God hasn’t forbidden us to go to Egypt! Baruch son of Neriah has convinced you to say this, because he wants us to stay here and be killed by the Babylonians or be carried off into exile.So Johanan and the other military leaders and all the people refused to obey the Lord’s command to stay in Judah.”

Jeremiah 43:1-3

Their Rejection

The word from God conflicts with what they want to do. They were hoping that Jeremiah would tell them that God said to go to Egypt. Instead, God tells them that if they go to Egypt, it will be to their demise and utter destruction.

Even though the people asked Jeremiah for God’s answer, they didn’t really want it. They basically wanted God’s approval on the plans they had already made. As you can probably guess, the people don’t listen to God’s words. They decide to go ahead with their own plan.

Forging Ahead without Asking God

We sit back and criticize these people, yet how many times have we done the same thing. We get into our mind what we want to do, and we pray and hope that God will bless those plans. We forge ahead with our own plan and hope it all works out.

But Solomon reminds us that our plans won’t prosper without God.

You can make many plans, but the Lord’s purpose will prevail.

Proverbs 19:21

We can make our plans, but the Lord determines our steps.

Proverbs 16:9 NLT

Our Response

We have to be careful that we don’t make our plans and just hope that God blesses what we are doing. Too often, we jump into something without asking God if it’s something we should pursue or not. Then we get frustrated with God when it doesn’t work out. In reality, it’s not God’s fault. We never stopped to check with him.

People ruin their lives by their own foolishness and then are angry at the Lord.

Proverbs 19: 3 NLT

The best way to stop making foolish mistakes is to ask God first before we jump into something. Spend the time now asking God what direction we should go before we make a mess of things. Ask God for wisdom first; follow that up with asking advice from a few wise counselors. If we do, we can spare ourselves a lot of heartbreak.

For More Encouragement

For more encouragement, check out my post You Can Avoid Making Foolish Decisions. A great book to read is The Best Yes by Lisa TerKeurst. The paperback is currently on sale on Amazon for $8.72.

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Hi friend, thanks for stopping by! I'm Amanda. I am a pastor's wife and a homeschooling mom who has a passion to encourage women to faithfully step every day into what God has for them.

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